A Little Different

I have readily acknowledged that I am not like everyone else, which is another way of saying a little different.  If more proof is needed, let me oblige.

Perhaps the ladies can relate to this, and the gents can recall seeing this:  A skirt tends to get twisted after sitting down, getting out of a car, etc.  What does a person who doesn’t touch the skirt with her bare hands do to straighten it out?  It’s not always convenient to put on gloves or even use baggies as pseudo-gloves when one is in a hurry or in danger of being observed.  The logical thing to do (in a germophobe’s mind) is to use the elbows, as they are close to the waist anyway.  That doesn’t mean it’s the ideal solution or that it is easy at all.  And it doesn’t mean that it won’t result in some embarrassment.  I’m certain I’ve been seen digging an elbow or two into my side numerous times, but it was humiliating when it happened at the office.  I got up out of my chair to leave my cubicle, but my skirt was askew.  I should have stepped back into the corner where I could adjust it in private, but I stood there close to the entrance doing my little dance.  And this particular skirt wasn’t going to cooperate, so it was quite a performance.  Right in the middle of it, the male co-worker in the cubicle across from mine walked out of his entrance.  He paused for a few moments, and I was so engrossed in my project that I didn’t realize at first that I had an audience.  When I finally looked up and saw him, I retreated in embarrassment to the cover of my cubicle walls.

Sometimes people will comment when they see my unusual behavior, or shall I say techniques.  One of my long-standing habits has been to use my knuckles to press the console buttons when paying for products in a store.  I’m not sure that I benefit myself that much because I spray the knuckles as soon as possible afterwards and usually rub them with my fingers anyway.  So why not simply use my fingertips and spray them.  The only real advantage I see is that, if I can’t spray immediately, my fingertips will remain relatively clean so that I can continue to touch necessary objects.  But my atypical knuckle usage has not gone unnoticed.  I used to think that I was doing it so quickly and discreetly that no one saw it.  I thought that was the case until a clerk said to me, “I never thought to use my knuckles!”  Bubble burst.  On another occasion, I saw a store clerk using hand sanitizer after I had paid for my things (no cash involved) and was getting ready to walk away.  If only the poor thing knew that that was one time it wasn’t truly necessary.  I guess if I observe the quirks of others, I can’t expect them to be oblivious to mine.

I suppose that I am more than a little different from most people, and I will undoubtedly share more of my idiosyncrasies as they come up.  Stay tuned and compare.

 
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