FEELING VERY DEPRESSED. I M GIRL WHO IS LIVING WITH GRANDPARENTS DUE TO DEATH OF FATHER. MY MOTHER NEVER GAVE ME TIME. SHE GOT REMARRIED. I SPENT MY CHILDHOOD IN LONELINESS. WHEN I WAS IN 9TH STD, I TRIED TO COMMIT SUICIDE BECOZ I GT VERY LESS MARKS IN HI

FEELING VERY DEPRESSED. I M GIRL WHO IS LIVING WITH GRANDPARENTS DUE TO DEATH OF FATHER. MY MOTHER NEVER GAVE ME TIME. SHE GOT REMARRIED. I SPENT MY CHILDHOOD IN LONELINESS. WHEN I WAS IN 9TH STD, I TRIED TO COMMIT SUICIDE BECOZ I GT VERY LESS MARKS IN HISTORY.. AND MY GRANDPARENTS ARE TOO STRICT. I WAS FRIGHTENED. I DINT SHOW MY MARKSHEET. I DRANK BAYGON.BUT IT DINT WORK ON ME. I HAD VOMITING.AFTER LONG TIME NOW AGAIN I M FEELING DEPRESSED AND GETTING INTENSE FEELING TO COMMIT SUICIDE.NOW I PASSED M.SC. I TRIED TO TRANSFORM MY NATURE, TRIED TO THINK POSITIVE. BUT EVERYBODY IS BLAMING ME. TODAY MY FIANCEE SHOUTED ON ME BECOZ HE WAS UPSET WITH MONEY MATTERS. HE MET ME 1 YEAR BACK. I WAS NOT INTERESTED IN HIM. BUT I SAID ES TO HIM JUST NOT TO HURT HIM. NOW GETTING MARRIED WITH HIM.I WANT TO CHANGE. I AM VERY ANGRY PERSON.SMALL PETTY MATTERS INFLUENCE MY ANGER.I GET DEPRESSED VERY EASILY.I GOT FEELING THAT EVERONE HATES ME. MY FRIENDS ARE JEALOUS OF ME.THEY ARE MY ENEMIES DUE TO WHICH I CANT SHARE MY SORROWS WITH THEM. THERE IS NO1 WITH WHOM I CAN SHARE MY PROBLEMS. MY FIANCEE GETS ANGRY SAYING U R PESSIMIST OR NEGATIVE THINKER. NEVER TRIES TO UNDERSTAND ME.NOW I M AT HOME NOT DOING JOB. MY MIND REMAINS EMPTY. I WATCH SERIALS, SURF INTERNET WHOLE DAY, TRY TO MEDITATE, READ BOOK ON HOW TO GET RID OF SELF NEGLECT. STILL I HATE MYSELF. I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT I AM.

DO NOT MARRY if you don't love him... u'll only end up hurting him and urself more... but what do i know... i'm an emotional fool my self... anyways... i don't know if it helps but you're not the only one whose sad. and it isn't ur fault... it's that god (or destiny or whatever crap it is that rules our life) that's a bitch... it just wants to screw our lives...