What is happening to me my world is upside-down

Submitted by Trilobite Mon 01/30/2012

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I'm only 12, homeschooled, dont get out much, and goin through puberty. I like girls its just that i think this all started when i got curious(im autistic and super smart) and looked up gay(don't question me i just get bored being cooped up) and just had a little thought about a world if i was gay. I thought it'd go away the next morning but no id be on my mind every minute of the day starting in my head then making my neck and heart feel tense and uneasy now it just my heart and it goes away when i masterbate while thinking of women, looking at women, or take a gay test and it comes out straight. i've liked 6 girls since fith grade (to show examples a girl that helped me out in 5th grade and 6th grade teacher) i liked a girl a month before this started now all i ask is save me from Satan help me live my dream of a wife and a child i can name after my deceased 4 year old half-brother. p.s my mom told me this catholic girl i knew back in elemtary and that helped a little

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