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i have a lot of questions me and my gf are at the one year pont and im miserable all the time and im treating her like i hate her when i dont. i do this in all my relationships at somepoint. i had a lot of trauma as a kid too any ideas

I have obsessive thoughts. i

I have obsessive thoughts. i always accuse her of cheating or hating me ..i have low self esteem i dont even know why she wants to be with me i have no ggod qualities. I pick t everything she does im irritable i yell i cry i get frustrated and upset i cant explain how my head feels when we try to talk about it...everyday in my head i picture her cheating on me. in different ways or i make myself believe shes talking to someone in a way she shouldnt even tho i KNOW shes not. i had a lot going on as a child my dad did a number on me my brother and mom and i now have a lot of issues from it... i obsessed with sex i dont go randomly have sex but i think about it all the time too when i was a little kid i used to touch my self play house with other girls in a sexual way i have been getting off since i was about between 8 and ten.. i cant remember any molestation or rape i dont think its just an obsessive thought... I NEED HELP. im tired lonel miserable and scared idk what to do anymore

Hi, I am so sorry to hear you

Hi, I am so sorry to hear you are experiencing these difficulties. The symptoms you discuss have facets of depression, paranoid personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, poor self-esteem and a syndrome of self-destructive tendencies. You could possibly have one of these issues or you may not; this can only be determined by establishing a relationship with a mental health professional. There is no need to suffer as you have been doing. I greatly encourage you to talk with a professional who can help you feel better.

As far as your relationship, I'm not sure why your girlfriend has been tolerating your treatment of her. You should immediately make a pact to have no more yelling and no drama; there is no place for these things in a healthy, intimate relationship. Talk with her about daily activities, not your suspicions. Instead, share your suspicions with the professional you allow to help you and treat your girlfriend with the respect we all deserve. Know that you DO have good qualities; I'm sure you have many of them, they are just hidden under the issues you are facing right now. Best wishes to you!

Lucy Boyd, RN, BSN

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