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Hi so i have lesbian friends, and all of a sudden one day, i got the idea in my head, what if i am too?? I never felt that way about any girls. i have ocd, ever since then i freaked and i feel like my attraction for guys is totally gone. HOCD or am I???

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i should probably clarify

i should probably clarify that i have always dreamed of marrying a man and having a family. I've always had crushes on guys and my stomach would flip flop when i saw them. But now its gone all of a sudden and i feel like what if that was never real? i feel like now i may be attracted to girls. I look at them and try to figure it out but i cant. All i know is that i dont want to be gay but im terrified that what if i really am. I cant tell if its just my obsessing making me thing im attracted to girls all of a sudden. It scared me because i want to be with men but i worry that what if i really am a lesbian. I heard about HOCD but im not sure if this is it or if i really am a lesbian and didn't know.

Hi, I would like to be able

Hi, I would like to be able to tell you to relax, but I know that is hard to do when your mind is having obsessive thoughts. If you have always been attracted to men, that is not likely to have changed. When you feel this anxious, you cannot "find" your attraction for men. It would be like trying to smell a rose while a bear is charging at you - your brain is prioritizing your fear, not attraction. These obsessive thoughts are very likely related to your obsessive-complulsive disorder. It seems that when the mind finds something that causes anxiety, whether its "hey, this mole looks cancerous" or "could I be a lesbian" it runs with it, causing you to obsess and try to test yourself incessantly. You say you have OCD but I'm wondering if you are currently in treatment for it. There are medications and different types of talk therapy and behavioral therapy; one of these can likely help you feel much better. I encourage you to seek treatment for this, just as you would for any other health condition.

Lucy Boyd, RN, BSN

I cant figure out if im

I cant figure out if im really a lesbian and afraid to be, or if this is really hocd. thinking i could be a lesbian sickens me because i dont want to be. it goes against my perfect fantasy for my future and my religion. i dont know where these thoughts came from. could it have possibly been that what i thought was an attraction for men was just me thinking there was because its the way i wqas raised? i do want to marry a man but im scared that what if i like women. i am thinking about seeing a therapist. does this sound like a sexual identity crisis or would you think hocd.

im so sorry to rant like

im so sorry to rant like this. this only started a few days ago. basically my concern is am truly a lesbian but cant accept it because im a "homophobe" due to a religious upbringing or is this hocd messing with me?

Hi, in OCD the brain often

Hi, in OCD the brain often creates anxiety relative to the things we most fear. For many, it's a fear of death, due to being killed or due to cancer. Others fear embarrassment and have to reread every email they write over and over before they send it. It sounds like, because you fear being gay, your mind is obsessing about it. But only a therapist can say this for sure and help you work this out.

Lucy Boyd, RN, BSN

thank you so much.

thank you so much.

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